Commitment

What is commitment?

“Once you get into the desert, there’s no going back…And, when you can’t go back, you have to worry only about the best way of moving forward.” – The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

What a powerful message this is! When we apply this outlook to our own lives, we realize the power of committing to our goals by looking forward. Sounds easy enough, right? However, there always seems to be a reason to play it safe, forfeiting a life of passion for a life of comfort. Do any of these sound familiar?

“It’s not the right timing”

“I cannot take the financial risk”

“My vision is unrealistic”

“No one will see my value”

“What if no one likes it?”

“I am not ready”

“Once it is perfect, I will move forward”

These are just a few of the internal excuses that delay or destroy our ability to live our passions. To be honest, many people have incredible visions and ideas that will add value to their lives, teams, company, etc., but, faulty thinking limits them.

How do we know if our thinking is faulty?

A quick exercise I do with clients is to analyze the thoughts that are hindering their progression towards a goal. Are these thoughts based in fact or opinion? If opinion, then are there reasons, research, or examples backing-up why we think this way? If not, we work to replace this thought with a positive one that will help us overcome doubt, anxiety and fear.

An opinion, without any validity, causes us to give up on our dreams. Imagine on a grand scale how many amazing ideas have not been shared in our lifetime; never being able to take a breath and exist in our world due to fear of rejection or failure.

Let’s be honest though. Commitment can be scary!

This is evident in how many people avoid relationships, stress on a college decision, play it safe in their sport, and in something as simple as deciding where to eat dinner tonight. This fear also occurs in making a commitment to our personal goals. It is easy to live in a world of comfort. It is easy to decide a decent salary is better than the unknown, and it is easy to be an average player on your athletic team.

Only a fully committed individual can be great at what they do. The purposeful action of laying out your priorities, and living by them, allows you to dedicate the time necessary for success. Understanding your priorities also allows you to embrace the necessary sacrifices, guilt-free. Full commitment can be one of the most empowering decisions we make in our lives. It can focus your efforts into a singular drive so you can chase your dream.

You deserve to chase your dream!

Before you chase, however, you must first commit. Great achievers surrender to the path they are on, developing their passion with each step they take. Greatness cannot be achieved solely in the mind and nor can passion. As mentioned, great thoughts that are not shared remain thoughts. The challenges you face along the way are the greatest teachers of confidence and passion. Prepare for the unknowns and embrace agility in your approach.

I challenge you to pursue that dream, to construct your vision. Each of us should fully commit to a passion at least once in our life. By full commitment, I mean putting your full emotion and necessary energy towards your goal. For one person this may be a scary full-time career change, while to someone else it means commitment to a part-time venture that they hope to grow organically. Maybe this passion is making a college team or maybe it is becoming an All-American athlete. Either way, give yourself to this passion, be vulnerable, and love the process!

Jump in with two feet!

Even if it is imperfect and even if the timing sucks, jump in with two feet and fully commit! Do not give yourself a Plan B and do not have a safety net in case you fall. Those outs only allow you to put one foot in and keep one foot out. Now, full commitment does not mean you should expect instant results. Sometimes we fully commit while understanding it will be an organic growth towards our goals. However, you cannot achieve your personal best without total commitment mentally, emotionally and physically. With one foot out of the arena, you will most likely abandon ship the first time you meet resistance or a setback.

The problem is, society has taught us to be careful. We, as a society, shun the dreamer, until their dream is realized. We celebrate creativity once it succeeds, but trample it too often in the name of education and being “realistic.” Remove yourself from the ‘typical’ timeline of life and dive into experiences.

I am challenging you to pursue your own definition of success and purpose. If this means you need to go straight to college from high school and straight to your career from college, then so be it. But, if you have a different calling, a different path, then pursue it with passion and vigor.

Let your dreams breathe, give your visions a chance to materialize. If you fail, so what? At least you went for it. At least you failed forward.

The journey through the forest, including the trips and falls, the scrapes and the bruises, is so much more important than the final destination (especially one defined by someone else).

So, jump in to your goals with two feet and never look back. Succeed because you have no other choice. Be persistent, be purposeful, be passionate!

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Ryan Defibaugh, LCPC, NCC, is the owner of MBS Performance Counseling, LLC in Frederick, MD. He works with adolescents and young adults to help them thrive in their athletic, academic, social, and personal lives. Ryan uses his experience as a Division I college coach along with his counseling background in order to empower our youth with skills such as optimism, resilience, grit, and problem-solving abilities.